That time I was the homecoming queen..

Summer before my senior year I had an opportunity to be a lifeguard at the Hollandale swimming pool.  Take what you know of public pools, and erase it from your memory.  The Hollandale pool was (I use past tense, because it is no longer) not in Hollandale.  Oh no, drive out of town to the country about 2.5 miles, turn down a few dirt roads and amid the corn/soy bean fields you will come to a LARGE hole in the ground.  The hole in the ground had been cemented in, had a sand bottom, a lifeguard tower was put in, as well as a diving board, and infamous floating raft in the deep end.  Add a fence, and some porta potty's and you've got Hollandale's pool. Of course turtles and other various wildlife wandered in on occasion, but that was all part of the charm!  It was a stellar summer job, I got the best tan of my life, and I worked with one of my Hollandale buddies.  We were quite the pair he and I, we taught swim lessons, pulled pranks on each other, and had a fun summer out there.  No one even drowned..which was kind of a miracle.  Looking back on all of my summer jobs, that one was by far my favorite.  I didn't have to work until noon, was done at 8:00pm, and was then free to lolligag around Albert Lea with  the peeps that had become 'my posse'. 

 

Headed to the Senior dance for Homecoming week. That van saw a lot of action that year..

My posse my last years of high school, interestingly enough, was comprised of mostly males.  I considered myself a bit of a chameleon, and could blend with whatever group I was with for class or activities..but my core group of friends....well, there's no way around this: we were a real shit show.  We had many, many skills.  If there were gold medals in toilet papering trees and saran wrapping cars, we would have been on the US Olympic team.  I'm not sure how we all found each other. (Actually I am, but the story is way to long to put in here)  We had a couple hockey players, a pretty boy, the student council president, various girlfriends that would float in and out with the changing weeks, a couple of younger classmen..and then there was me..funny girl, sister to my boys, and the voice of reason.  (Feel free to refer to me as Christ.  Just kidding, don't get get your undies in a bunch..) 

As summer drew to a close we knew this would be the start of a great year, and we were going to need to make it memorable along the way.  It was a beautiful fall that year.  Took in football games every Friday night, stayed out until all hours having bonfires, sneaking beers, and just talking about what the next step would be for all of us the following year. I felt so close to these guys, none of us made a move to do anything until we checked with the others.  We were our own little family, and that is the first time I realized how important friends were in my life. 

 

My escort for Homecoming.  Also, best hair in the class of 2000.

Before I knew it, homecoming was upon us.  I knew that I loved homecoming every year, because it involved shortened school days, and a chance to talk with all of my friends instead of being in class, and a week to dress up like idiots.  (Pajama Day, Toga Day, Rock Star day..etc.)  Being on the student council I was always able to plan all of the activities for school functions.  I especially liked that my senior year because, being the control freak that I was, (am) I was able to make sure homecoming was perfect for my class.  From the t-shirts, to the buttons, to the decorations for homecoming court, to the parade, by God it was going to be perfect.  A crazy thing happened a couple weeks before homecoming.  This chubby girl was nominated for homecoming queen.  Since I hadn't slept with anyone...I was a little confused as to how I got nominated.  I had been nominated for snow court/heart court (or whatever made up royalty we thought of for dances)..and I feel like may have won one of those at one point...but everyone puts homecoming court on a pedestal, which I will never completely understand.  I was thrilled when the announcement was made not that I was on the court, but that one of my oldest, and best friends was going to be there along side with me.  Anfinson and I had been pals since 6th grade, we went on vacations together, we spent nearly every weekend having some kind of a slumber party, she was the sister I never had.  (Fun fact, she still IS my sista from another Mista!) So we had a blast getting ready for that week together.  The homecoming court was an interesting mix.  The men had the usual: football players, various athletic guys..and then remember my little nerd prom date Junior year?  He was on there too, just hanging out with jocks, loving life.  It was pretty funny to see...though I suppose, it was funny to see what the ladies of the court brought to the table: Cute, cuter, cutest, ME.  I don't want to brag, but the queenly royalty were a bunch of frickin' hotties.  And I had no idea what the F#$*K I was doing there. 

At that point in my high school career, I had clearly become the class clown.  Not the moron, that says stupid stuff and everyone laughs at in class, and then doesn't talk to outside of the school walls...but the one that had off handed comments to say, that some teachers didn't always understand, but thought I was pretty harmless...and I was the one that peeps wanted to sit by because they knew we were going to laugh for the entire class period. However,  I was not what the pedestal of homecoming court should have been....

Next thing I know, I'm in my junior year prom dress, walking down the aisle of the school auditorium, to photos of me growing up with sentimental music in the background flashing on the big screen, my parents and all of their friends in the front row, awaiting the announcement of 1999's homecoming queen.  Talk about nerves.  I thought I was nervous for the Potato Queen coronation???  Shit.  To this day, I don't think my knees have ever shook as badly as they did at the moment before I was supposed to walk from the back of the auditorium, to the front, walk up the stairs to the stage and then stand there for how ever many minutes.  All the candidates got to choose their escort to the stage, and of course I picked one of my brotha's from another motha, to escort me.  I was petrified I was going to fall, and then take him with me.  He was just a little guy, if I went down, I was clearly bringing him with me, and thus ending his short existence.  Well, I hiked my fat ass down the aisle of that auditorium, and hung out on stage with those hotties...and for just a minute...I think I honestly believed I was just as hot as they were...suddenly a crown was on my head, I was confused, being shuffled toward a wicker chair to sit in...and the moment of believing I may be just as hot as my homegirls, was taken away as I was praying that little wicker chair wouldn't collapse under my massive fat ass.  Good news, those chairs are way sturdier than they look!

The 1999 Homecoming Court...Note tacky decor and wicker chair I was sure I was going to break.


The rest the day is a blur, just like the rest of senior year.  From that day I remember: lots of hugs, my parents crying, more hugs...hugs...and then realizing the next few days were going to be crazy, and all I really wanted to do was go home and take my bra off for a little bit.  No time that day, or that year for that matter.  I had more school activities to attend, plays to be in, another prom to go to, and I needed to co write the speech for commencement. Not to mention my parents decided we needed to celebrate graduation by taking me on a week long cruise to the caribbean!  I'm not sure I was bra free all year...It was a great year though, one I wouldn't take back, and one that set me up for my future. 

My brotha's

                                                

I was onto bigger things the following fall, or a small, private, Catholic college, in Southern Minnesota.  Either way, the wheels had been set in motion that year for me to bring Megan E. Radke to a whole new audience.  That little college campus didn't even see it coming...